If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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