I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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