I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
