I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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