I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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