you're like a bully in the Christmas story
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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