Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
