I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize