Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
