i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
cat food counts as protein by the way
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
