Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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