This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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