We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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