Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
