Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
