All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
