During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize