That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
