and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
