btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
