She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
