Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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