I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize