Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
