on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
