You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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