you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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