people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
