sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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