how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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