If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
