i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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