just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
