ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
If that was your dad, he is hot
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
