Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
