dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
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