True but thats because hes a fetus.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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