she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
