Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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