she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Ketchup is God's man juice
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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