Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize