Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
