When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
