1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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