We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
