I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
