So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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