Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
