Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
