I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
